Fantastic day here in the northernmost part of Italy. My “Roomdog” Paolo somehow got us an invitation at the greatest Brunch in Europe.
Our Gorilla football cornerback Barba – a really fantastic man – picked us up and zipped us around Varese to get to this anticipated dining experience.
(From what I understand Barba = Beard) He has a beautiful one.
The breakfast-lunch affair was held at the home of Marissa and Daniel (Danny, Dan …. I was told to pick whatever I wanted to call him.) It was a tremendous spread. Daniel (Dan, Danny) made all kinds of things but his pancakes were especially good!
Stuff like bacon, beer, toast, salmon, nutella, yogurt, beer, mimosas, peanut butter, beer, Funzies (yeah you figure that one out) …and beer (did I already say beer).
What a wonderful way to spend several hours. It was funny the mix of Italian … which I know a few words…. and translations … then English which they basically all speak and translations.
One thing I have learned over the years is that some of Italian speakers are a little self-conscious of their English. It’s silly – they are very good. Compared to my minimal speaking ability in any language (including English by the way) these people are unbelievable.
Anyway after a few mimosas pretty much everyone was comfortable with telling stories … and translating for the dumbass in the room – me! I absolutely loved the visit.
By the way they have a massive young Bernese Mountain Dog – or small bear – named Polo (please forgive me Polo if I am misspelling your name because you can certainly eat me and sixty five other people in one setting.)
So after this brunch everyone sat around and decided what to do with the ugly American – oh that is me! Should we go to the mountain, the lake, the park, the bar …. run that back you said “the bar”. (Too many people are worrying about my old ass!)
My vote was evident!
So … a decision was made after a truly lengthy discussion – no not to the bar – we went to the park.
Dragging along a case of very large Poretti #5 bottled beer we spent the rest of the day throwing a football around and making sure Polo (the small bear or Bernese Mountain Dog) did not eat the small children in the area.
I found two very attractive women who could throw the ball … Marissa and Ylenia. The men not so much. Oh they were my friends from brunch!
Well … then we went to the bar in the Varese City Center area. Back to “Te’ Capi” which is the homebase of my Italian football friends the Varese Gorillas!
A few hours and several drinks later we pulled up stakes and headed home. For the second or third time here in Italy I attempted (quite vigorously) to pick up the tab … this time rebuffed by a 6’7″ bar master who said my friend Chris was taking care of it.

I honestly told this very large man (who is a basketball player for the Swiss National Team) before we even sat down that I was taking the bill. He said yeah great.
Well, it didn’t turn out that way. What a bunch of BS. He basically told me that I had no voice in the decision. Well he was at least 6-7 so I am not going to get into that!
So I discover this … for hours my friends here in northern Italy will argue, cajole, discuss what to do or where to go but they cannot make a quick decision on where to go, when to go, when to leave.
But they sure as hell can make a quick decision on preventing the dumbass ugly American from paying a bill.
Don’t worry their day is coming!