Many people don’t realize the cursing is an art and I have been around some of the best – and I consider myself to be an elite cusser myself.
I was reminded of this just last nite after talking to my friend Carl Mauch. Carl was a fine football player who played center many years for the Houston Oilers (yes they did have a team in Houston before the Texans) and then the Chargers (oops then moved too!). We coached together for several years – were fired together as well. Ah the coaching life.
Anyway Carl must rank among the top five people I know in the utilization of “blue” words. However he is one of the people you meet who would also give you the shirt off his back. Just a really great friend.
Anyway Carl has one of the ultimate sayings that I know of: “F***’em all…..all but six.” What that means is you only need six friends and F**k the rest of them (I am now one of the six since his one buddy Lefty has passed from the scene.) The reason you need six is because you need six people to carry the coffin at the end.
But Carl is an inspirational swear master – an accomplished man in utilizing all types of phrases and words in different combinations.
Anyway…he got me to thinking about the art of cussing (just an aside – when I was in eighth grade or so Debbie Berg (who sat in front of me in several classes told me she thought I was a nice guy and all but I swore way too much..hmmm). I think her Dad was a minister.
Here are some random thoughts I had on the matter.
Just think of the word sh*t. You can be a sh*t head, sh*t heel or a sh*t bird. But you better give a sh*t about the sh*t you do. So it’s not the type of word you want to sh*t can. So get your sh*t together and use this word because it is the sh*ts!
Then there is the word ass – which in itself is not a cuss word if you think about it. Because you can be an ass….that’s not good – but it is OK to say. But when you call some one a dumbass or wise ass or perhaps a smart ass what are the differences technically? Obviously you would prefer not to be a fat ass or probably a jackass either.
These are just some of the bitchin cuss words that I know and use at all times. Often you have to be a son of a bit*h to be bit*hing about cussing too much.
I’ll leave you with this thought from one of the best – maybe the best cusser I know. Rod Marinelli (ex Lion HC, Defensive Coordinator at Dallas now). He once said 62 cuss words in 10 minutes (I know because I was in charge of counting them in our meetings.)
His best……”That is totally f***ed…. that f***ing f***er f***ed up!”